04 [written/action]

[wipesfaith]

[Classic incognito message, with the picture blocked out and everything; he even makes an attempt to disguise his handwriting, which he forgets after the first three words.]

Say you want to ask a girl out. How do you go about doing that?

Girls like flowers, right?

[See, there's actually a lot of consideration that goes into this. For a guy with a faulty brain-to-mouth filter and a do-or-die attitude, the amount of waffling here is...strange, maybe. But everyone's a walking contradiction. He has some ideas, along with maybe ten different speeches that he's mentally mapped out over the past three years and never planned on actually using, but second- and third-guessing himself leads to this pandering for advice...thing. He's pretty sure it's lame, but... It couldn't hurt, right?

Okay, so maybe he's just procrastinating.]

[Action]

[Anonymous dweebiness aside, Jean goes about his day as usual. Training at the Battle Dome; going to school; taking care of his horse at the stables, and taking him out for a ride into the woods; and checking the General Store for some...supplies, art supplies. Don't ask, don't tell.]

Comments

[written, anonymous]

[complicatedliar]

Oh good. A sign of civilization in this desert.

At least a few ladies ought to be pleased.

[written, anonymous]

[voidseeing]

One of them is very pleased indeed. There's no ambiguity on that end.

[written, anonymous]

[complicatedliar]

Oh, two of them in total at the least, I assure you. I've my own assurances.

[Mentally exchanging the world's most smug brofist.]

[written, anonymous]

[voidseeing]

Then it sounds like our question-asker here is in good hands.

[Aww yeeeeaaaaah.]

[written, anonymous]

[complicatedliar]

We probably ought to save that for lesson number two. The poor thing seems to be reeling already.

[written, anonymous]

[wipesfaith]

The hell are you two even talking about?

[Written]

[whiskytraitorfirefight]

[Oh, Jean. Ginia's been reading and trying not to laugh.]

They're talking about oral sex. Cunnilingus.

Re: [Written]

[complicatedliar]

Shh. You're spoiling the fun. He'll never learn anything if you just GIVE him the answers.

[Written]

[whiskytraitorfirefight]

Sometimes getting an answer leads to research. But that was the only freebie they're getting from me, I'll let you two continue on.

[Written]

[revolutionarygirl]

I

[There's evidence that she dropped her quill at this point. It doesn't even occur to her to hide her identity because what in the world...

She may be naive as all hell, but she does know what "sex" is. Connecting the dots on what "oral sex" could be is easy enough.]

What the hell is wrong with you guys?! You can't just jump into something like that! That kind of advice is the worst! Do you want this person to get slapped?!

[She really wishes she hadn't read that.]

Why would you even put your mouth there, anyway? That's so weird!

[anonymous, Written]

[complicatedliar]

Oh you poor thing. If only someone loved you.

[written]

[revolutionarygirl]

And what exactly does love have to do with that?

[Written]

[whiskytraitorfirefight]

[Hey, don't shoot the messenger! Or joke spoiler? Either or.]

I can't speak for the other two, but I'm certainly not endorsing sex on the first date (though no judgement at all if it happens). I'm only explaining the joke.

[There's a long pause and a few stray dots of ink before Ginia writes a bit more.]

When done properly, it can be quite pleasurable, but oral sex is a thing of preferences. Some enjoy receiving, others don't, some enjoy giving, others don't.

[Written, anonymous]

[wipesfaith]

[...Oh. Oh. Now he's red in the face because oh my god--]

I'm not doing that on a first date!

[Written]

[whiskytraitorfirefight]

No one is expecting you to.

[Written, anonymous]

[complicatedliar]

Coward.

[Written, anonymous]

[voidseeing]

No one said it had to be on the first date. You asked about things girls like and people answered. It's up to you whether you want to use any of the suggestions.

[written, anonymous]

[voidseeing]

We might have to start him off with a coloring book first. He seems to be having some trouble with the basics.

[written, anonymous]

[wipesfaith]

Maybe your advice just sucks.

[written, anonymous]

[complicatedliar]

If you're deliberately obtuse, you're never going to get a girl. Women don't find that attractive at all.

Tongues all the way down. All the way down.

[written, anonymous]

[voidseeing]

No, my advice is to suck. They like that too.

[Good thing this is written, because he is definitely laughing right now.]

[written, anonymous] 1/2

[sketchingideals]

[There's no way in hell this would be posted with his name attached.]

Don't push him into it! You shouldn't rush that sort of thing, because it's special. And you should only do it if the girl likes it. Different girls like different things!

[written, anonymous] 2/2

[sketchingideals]

Then again, my girlfriend likes it. And being on top of [--wait, no. Noooooooo. He shouldn't even be saying this!]

I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything! Please forget that I did!

[CLOSING THE JOURNAL NOW.]

[written]

[revolutionarygirl]

On second thought, just do the flowers. It's a lot less weird than what these people are suggesting.

[Ugh.]

[written]

[wipesfaith]

Thank you.

[Utena, you are the undeniable voice of reason here.]